Word Fun

So this post isn't going to have anything to do with Leo Dicaprio, sorry to disappoint. Instead I though I would go with this new word game I though of just now. Rules below.

1. I pick a letter and then write a sentence.
2. In the sentence, every word starting with that letter signifies the OPPOSITE of what word should be there.
3. Decode for hours of fun and amusement!

For example: "F"

"free cars are fancy and fun."

which would mean:

"Expensive cars are basic and boring."

Get it? I know it wasn't funny, that's why I burned it in the EXAMPLE section.
Try this hilarity on for size...

"L"

"Little ladies with long legs give shitty, uncomfortable hugs!"

ZAP! FUN-E! How about this...

"C"

"so you say you can't stomach cooked hot-dogs? Try chewing dog-shit!"

Yessssss.....

And finally...

"P and H"

"Pretty pimps make for hard hens and horny housewives."

ZING! That last one got a little raunchy! That is if any of this is actually making any sense to anyone! Holla if you hear me!.... (silence)(sound of crickets)(lone tear down the cheek)